<$BlogRSDURL$>
Chase me, ladies, I'm in the cavalry
Monday, June 15, 2015
 
Disappointed to see the Mail on Sunday's Peter Hitchens stealing peanuts in the British Airways lounge yesterday. When his flight to Tenerife flight was called he looked around furtively and crammed about eight packets into his underpants. 

"Give over, ah wor fair starving," the oaf roared,  in his broad Yorkshire accent, when I remonstrated with him. 

On reflection, I'm not certain it was Hitchens.

|

Comments:
2 comments in a year? It's overkill. Please take another sabbatical.

Oddly, I was just reading about you on the BBC site- "Mr Symonds, whose username was "Chase me ladies, I'm the Cavalry", told the Guardian that Wikipedia had barred a user called "Contribsx" because the account had been used to make changes to Mr Shapps' profile". See http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-33055855
 
Also, happy Bloomsday for tomorrow. Like you know what that is.
 
Let that be a lesson to you, Harry. Never try to identify a man unless you've smelt his armpits. That man could have been a trained assassin, rather that the pontificating sissy journalist you took him for. In a fight between you and Hitchens, I am confident that you would pulverise his testicles.
 
He's probably stocking up for winter, like all good Yorkshiremen. Usually they employ some handy hollow oak near their cave, but when travelling even a northerner can get creative in re holes for storage...
 
Hasn't some Government outfit said that eating peanuts everyday can prolong you life? Get eating, Hutton, we need you for as long as possible.
 
Glad to see this site is still hyperactive. And has a comma been added to the masthead, or am I misremembering?
 
npetrikov, you old humbug, how good it is to see you! Is this the first comment you've made since haloscan became defunct?
 
I saw Peter Hitchens at a grocery store in London yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Cadbury bars in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

 
I can quite believe it. I once saw Hitchens on a bus in El Paso stealing from an old woman's handbag. He was wearing a cowboy hat and was enormously fat, so I didn't immediately recognise him. But it was Hitchens all right. When I remonstrated with him, he ran away, wheezing like a knackered old hippo.
 
He was in our driveway last night having our bins over, that bl00dy Hitchens; him & his Burkean mates with their bushy bl00dy tails.
 
Good to see all of these fertile snide comments being made again. I followed this site for a while and then it faded away and my existence bloomed. Soap fro breakfast, lunch and inner ensued.
 
I saw Mr Hitchens in a local Wetherspoons at the weekend. He was alone, drinking a pint of strong lager, sometimes shaking his head and muttering "oh what's the bloody point?".
 
His flight to Tenerife flight? Do they have metaflights now, to make up for the fact that half the country isn't runways at Heathrow?
 
There's a nutsack joke there somewhere, but I haven't time to exploit the opportunity.
 
There's a cock joke there too. There's one in any post that mentions Peter Hitchens.
 
Splendid!
 
Am Julia Andrea From USA I never believed that i could finally get back the happiness and the love that was gone after my husband left me totally. I couldn't just believe that spells and magic could turn my thoughts and my dreams into reality in getting back with my husband after he served me with divorce papers.. my ex husband after the divorce never showed up to me and the kids anymore, he finally made up his mind on me and said it was over. 2 years after our divorce, i was still out trying to get him back and i did all that i knew best could make him happy, and my mum and everybody around just advised i should forget about him and move on with my life, because they felt he was gone forever and was never gonna return. But i never gave up on trying to get him back, because i so much loved him beyond what anybody could ever imagine. I met a spell caster, and what drew my attention most was the fact that this spell caster was from Africa when i contacted Dr ATILA. And that so much gave me the assurance because i have heard much more on how he has helped alot of people... and with the help that Dr ATILA rendered to me, he saved my marriage and reunited me and my ex husband back together again with his powerful spells. Thank you so much Dr ATILA for your help in reuniting me and my husband again, if not for you, my life would have permanently turned out to b a mess. His mail:atilahealinghome@yahoo.com.v
 
Hutton, I hope you're going to reply to Julia's commnent above. A man with your limited experience of life should be grateful to receive such advice from a woman well-versed in the vicissitudes of human relationships.
 
Saw this article and thought of you!

http://metro.co.uk/2015/07/16/squirrel-walks-into-a-bar-gets-drunk-and-smashes-it-up-this-is-not-a-joke-5299146/

 
Hitchens is everywhere. I saw him up a tree stealing eggs from endangered species. He said he was only checking to see if they were ok. Had acquired quite a suntan from this type of thing. And was wearing a penis-gourd, a cunning disguise. But it was definitely him.
 
Take it like a bitch boy, Harry.
 
Great article. Thanks sharing this article.
Love sms| Funny sms| Love Quotes
smsgog.com





 
Post a Comment




TWITTER



ECONOMICS AND POLITICS

Krugman's cat

I agree with Abu Hamza- up to a point

The time I punched JK Galbraith

Who was worse: Blair or Hitler?

In Defence of John Prescott

Prescott 2



CELEBRITY NEWS

Jennifer Lopez has been shot!

Nicholas Cage is a tit

A Rolex, though ugly, will pay for itself in quim

Colombian death squads dump Kate Moss

50 Cent almost too stupid to speak

Ooh, brain hurts

Nothing fishy about monster carp says Krugman

I'm so angreeee

Ben Affleck

The Magic of Snoop

Inane Dogg

Germaine Greer's gusset


MEANINGLESS HOAXES

Correspondence with the Ku Klux Klan

Correspondence with Boris Johnsons

Ministry of Defence

Thames Valley Police

Meatloaf

British Airways- I'll show those fucks

Bank

The Polite Society

Is this a library or a bordello?

Rumsfeld

Israeli Embassy

My MP

The Scottish National Party

Garry Bushell

Letter to Gunsmith (1)

Greenspan

Richard Dawkins


TEACHING ENGLISH

Your child is an illiterate cabbage

Like a trouser, yet not a trouser

Why is life so wretched?

Stopping Hitler at Munich

The British Council- at least it's not run by a drunk

Non-academic sub-adult clowning

You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear

No sane man cares about such things

Who, whom?

Your daughter is very beautiful, but unfortunately completely stupid

The Business English racket

Keith Richards' English level

The Dunderheads shall inherit the earth

Teaching English to cretins

This is a real pain in the arse

I hate teaching English


BRITAIN

I'm sick of this country and its stupid taps

Glue sniffers

Yorkshire Yahoos

The British public are deeply stupid

The UK's most successful ethnic group

Violent Britain

The man on the Clapham omnibus is a cretin

How much do you give a ponce?

Reflections on the British drunk

This septic isle

Thoughts on muggers

Do you want a punch in the mouth?

How many divisions has Eddie Izzard?

Most of the world’s problems still caused by Britain

This country's really gone to hell since we stopped burning papists

Many of my best friends are bishops

Britain's Unfunniest Comedian

Reading, Berkshire, is a dog hole

Please go away


COLOMBIA

Shut your cake hole, you lunatic

I don't care about human rights that much

Why I don't take drugs

Someone is getting mugged

I am a victim of crime

That which does not kill you almost kills you

I don't know how much more I can take

Colombian girl santas

The hippos of Pablo Escobar


VENEZUELA

Dancing on the deck of the Titanic

You toucha my pies, I shoota you head

The pros and cons of domestic violence

Life? Don't talk to me about life

The evil Castro cured my cough

Breast implants out of control

Venezuelan crude is heavy and sour, like the women in High Wycombe

One of those parties that got out of hand

Do you believe everything The Economist tells you?

Don King has lots of good ideas

Chavezfest (1)

Chavezfest (2)


BLOGGERS

The Instapundit: a master of the bore's craft

Pie attacks on Professor Krugman

Hooahs!

The Andrew Sullivan Hoax

Eminem, Bin Laden, Tim Blair, etc.

If you don't clear off, I'll set the dogs on you

Malkins and Hinderaker: not for an age, but for all time

Instapundit failing the boring man in a pub test

The fearless Huffington

Sourpuss Malkin

Book!


THE GREAT BIG WAR AGAINST TERROR

If you stick your dick in a bees' nest you'll get stung

I am opposed to the hacking off of heads

Iraq- it's all a matter of perspective

Top ten warmongers

Islamic Banking

Knob heads

Bush pursues terrorist beyond the grave

Another atrocity


NORTH KOREA

Kim Jong Il wouldn't do that- it's irrational

Addio Amore, Addio Razza

If London is still standing in 2020, I'll eat my hat

Kim Il Sung's birthday!

Billy Graham in North Korea

North Korea job offer

The time I saw a woman get savaged by a bear


SPORTS JOURNALISM

People who like football should be put in boxes and bulldozed into the sea

Please hit our fans with clubs

Baseball is idiotic

I love Brazilian Ultimate Fighting

World Cup diary


PALESTINE

Where to buy beer in Gaza

The time I worked as a film censor in the Gaza Strip

Someone threw a bomb in our garden

It is high time Mr Arafat made up his mind if he is going to live or die

Israel / Palestine- the problem of two men in one trousers

Israel's wall

Meet the Arafats


AUSTRALIA

Is it wrong to execute Australians?

Anzac day

Twisted gonads

Australians vs. camels

Off with the false whiskers

The Australian Broadcasting Corporation


LITERATURE

Your severed foot would look good on my coffee table

Condi 2008, a love poem

It doesn't seem to make sense

Fisking the poet Keats


STUDENT WORK

Gaza

Brazil

Venezuela

Italy

Hong Kong

When you sleep on the "cheap" bed, you will feel it is too bad



TRAVEL

Christ were those peasants ugly

Machete man asks me for money

Tips for visiting prisoners

Trip to the Orinoco


TODD MATHERS

Personal injury lawyer

President Ahmajinadad


MISC

Live-blogging the plane crash

Prison survival tips

Suicide statistics

Survey: Britons marginally less unpopular than the French

David Irving

Arab Americans

If you like rock music you must be stupid

Quality of life index

A pogrom of quails

Krugman in Bogota

People now idiots- TV to blame

Goldman Sachs makes billions shorting Goldman Sachs stock

Rum

The Amis brothers

Haiku on another wasted year


BARRY HUTTON'S POSTS

The illusion of plenty

Diets


KILLER FACTS!

Killer Fact! (Brazil)

Killer Fact! (Quality of life index)

Killer Fact! (Canada)

Killer Fact! (New York Times)

Killer Fact! (Paraguay)

Killer Fact! (Häagen-Dazs)

Killer Fact! (Napoleon)

Killer Fact! (Brixton)

Killer Fact! (Switzerland)

Killer Fact! (Pakistan)

Killer Fact! (Shenzhen)

Killer Fact! (Brazil 2)

Killer Fact! (Colombia)

Killer Fact! (France)

Killer Fact! (British National Party)

Killer Fact! (Brazil, World Cup)

Killer Fact! (Vietnam)

Killer Fact! (Shenzhen)

Killer Fact! (Ivory Coast)

Killer Fact! (Sweden)

Killer Fact! (Vegans)

Killer Fact! (Lenin, Trotsky, Stalin, Engels)

Killer Fact! (Casanova)

Killer Fact! (James Bond)

Killer Fact! (Iraq / foxhunting)

Killer Fact! (Drug abuse in Iran)

Killer Fact! (Murder rates)

Killer Fact! (Strangling)

Killer Fact! (Buglaries)

Killer Fact! (Switzerland 2)

Killer Fact! (Saddam Hussein / New York Times)

Killer Fact! (Evian)

Killer Fact! (Suicide bombers)

Killer Fact! (Bollywood)

Killer Fact! (Australian women)

Killer Fact! (Costa Rica)

Killer Fact! (Cocaine mark-ups)

Killer Fact! (Jesuits)

Killer Fact! (Iceland)

Killer Fact! (Nobel Prizes by nationality)

Killer Fact! (King Shaka of the Zulus)

Killer Fact! (North Korea)

Killer Fact! (Red Heads)

Killer Fact! (Death row)

Killer Fact! (Japan)

Killer Fact! (Thailand)

Killer Fact! (highest-grossing film in history)

Killer Fact! (Churchill's mother)

Killer Fact! (Fastest growing economies)

Killer Fact! (First English sentence)

Killer Fact! (Wodehouse, Raymond Chandler)

Killer Fact! (Swiss Civil War)

Killer Fact! (Alcohol consumption)

Killer Fact! (Anglo-French Wars)

Killer Fact! (Price of barrels)

Killer Fact! (Iraqi Jews)

Killer Fact! (Top ten warmongers)

Killer Fact! (Karl Marx' uncle)

Killer Fact! (India)

Killer Fact! (Yuletide murders)

Killer Fact! (Tories)

Killer Fact! (Frogs)

Killer Fact! (Romeo and Juliet)

Killer Fact! (New York Times / Saddam Hussein)

Killer Fact! (The Evil Castro)

(More Killer Facts and other things in the archives.)



Blogger profile

Normblog profile

Don't Date Him Girl.com

Home video Twitter page




LINKS
NO2ID
Fitwatch
The Queen

NOT SUITABLE FOR MINERS
Emerald Bile
Hung Bunny
Old Holborn




The Magistrate's Blog



THE BIG LYCHEE
Batgung
Flagrant Harbour
Fumier
Glory, Glory Tottenham Hotsblog
Hemlock's Diary
Nude king
Ordinary Gweilo
Pigdogfucker
Seelai
Simonworld
Give me spirit fingers
The Shaky Kaiser


LAND OF THE DINGO
Tim Blair
Bastards Inc
The Love Quote
Tony T
Will Type for Food


MUD ISLAND
Ambulance driver's blog
Aunty Marianne
Virtual Stoa
Eric the Unread
Apostate Windbag
Backward Dave
Blood and Treasure
Brian Appleyard
Brian Micklethwait
Bristling Badger
British Bulldog
Chicken yoghurt
The man on the Clapham omnibus
Copper's Blog
Crooked Timber
The curmudgeon
Ian Dale
Deleted by tomorrow
Devil's Kitchen
Disappointed of West Egg
Doctor Vee
Drink soaked Trostykist popinjays for war
Dsquared
Eskimo
Fat Sparrow
A Fistful of Euros
Flying Rodent
Frank Chalk
Freedom and Whisky
Guest speaker's and writer's corner
Guido Fawkes
Hak Mao
Harry's Place
Horse's Ass Pub
Inspector Gadget
Jah Jah Dub
Japing Ape
Jomama
Jonny Billericay
JuliusB
Konichiwa Bitches
It's a dog's life
Laban the Tall
A Londoner's Life
Manuel Estimulo
My boyfriend is a twat
Natalie Solent
Nick Barlow
Normblog
Patrick Crozier
Pooter Geek
Pub philosopher
Samizdata
Scary Duck
Shuggy
Streams of Consciousness
Squander Two
Tampon Teabag
Thin Blue Line
This is this
Tim Worstall
Twenty Major
Where's the Kaboom?

REVOLTED COLONIES
Alicublog
Angua
Aunt Jemima
Bete du jour
Blair Necessities
Bogol
Demokat
Firedoglake
Jessica Coen
MaxSpeak
Publius Pundit
The People's Republic of Seabrook
Spacestation Shuttle Blog
Tony Pierce
Vice Squad
Zembla

SEAL-CLUBBING DOMINION
Eroticalee (Achtung! Not worksafe.)

LIVING THE VENEZUELAN DREAM
Caracas Chronicles
The Devil's Excrement
vcrisis
Alfredo Octavio
Venezuela News and Views
Oil Wars
Borev
Colombia Reports


HUGUENOTS
Brad Delong
Kim Du Toit



WE DON'T NEED NO STINKING BADGES. JOIN THE NO2ID CAMPAIGN
NO2ID Donor



email: harryjhutton{*}yahoo.com








©Not copyright. Take anything you like, I couldn't give a toss.